Strikeforce: Miami. Don’t Call it a Preview
__________________________________________________________________________Strikeforce: Miami may be the biggest MMA card in the history of the Silver Medal MMA promotion as this card is lined with star power, competitiveness (finally sanctioned by The Florida Athletic Commission for a Lashley fight), and even Herschel Walker. Strikeforce will mark the debut, of the man who is on a warpath to eat Fedor Emelianenko, of current pro wrestler Bobby Lashley. Gina-Killer and party pooper Cris “Cyborg” Santos will also be in action along with pro bowler turned trade bait Herschel Walker. 
Screw the pro bowl. There will be no punches pulled (that we know of) for this stacked card, and the none of the fanfare we spilled in your lap in that last paragraph is even included in The Main Event.
Melvin Manhoef (-190) over Robbie Lawler. Robbie Lawler is one of our personal favorites here in The Dept., and it hurts to pick against him, but we couldn’t help but be inclined to pick Manhoef in this fight. MMA is one of the few sports, along with baseball, where it is good thing to have filthy stuff on the internet. Looking at some of Melvin Manhoef’s highlight reels on Youtube automatically distinguishes him as a beneficiary of such an honor.
Robbie Lawler will be overwhelmed in this bout and could win if he allows the fight to stretch out, thus causing Melvin and his his muscles to tire exponentially. Standing and striking will be prominent in this fight, and Bobby Lashley’s miniature offspring (Melvin Mahoef) can and will stand and strike with the best of them.
Jay Hieron (-450) over Joe Riggs. Hieron has hit his stride and very well may be on his way to the top of the welterweight division. Only time will tell. His next ‘test’ will be against the very Aryan Joe Riggs. The fact that Hieron struggled in the UFC would alarm me – if this were a UFC fight. but Jay Hieron has found success everywhere else he goes, and his opportunistic style should land him a victory against the versatile Riggs, who has actually been pretty hot lately.
Herschel Walker (-325) over Greg Nagy. Get your blogs ready, because this is where the fun begins. Herschel Walker keeps himself in great shape and is an incredible athlete in case you didn’t know. Strikeforce needs to do a good job of ‘taking care’ of Walker by matching him up against beatable competition as they’ve already done here by throwing Greg Nagy to the wolves. Greg Nagy is like that first boss in Sonic The Hedgehog, designed to get you acclimated with the flow of the game before Dr. Robotnik really starts to fuck with you. Herschel Walker avoids Youtube infamy and wins convincingly in the first freaking round.
Cristiane Santos (-675) over Marloes Coenen. When Cristiane Santos destroyed American Sweetheart Gina Carano, the kneejerk reaction was to dismiss Carano as ‘overrated’ and a ‘fraud’. Erroneous. Cyborg is just that good, and just that bad (in a good way), at the same time. Did you see those videos of her standing and trading with her male counterparts? Had that degenerated into a shoot fight, we’d put our money on Cyborg even if she was restricted of a handicap that allowed her to utilize kicks to the groin.
From the ‘puncher’s chance in hell’ department, Marloes Coenen is no Paul Shirley slouch with a fantastic submission game and efficient striking. Cyborg will want to impose her will out of the shoot, the same way she did with Gina, to smother Coenen and her propensity to take this fight to the ground and snap an arm off.
Cyborg wins, but this fight looks to be about 1:30 of pure action.
Bobby Lashley (-1200) over Wes Sims. I know what you’re thinking. ‘Lame. Big Nasty is taking all the favorites’. Fuck you. You’re god damned right I’m loading up on the chalk because this is one of those ‘star making’ cards designed to develop momentum and talent for a promising Strikeforce promotion (heading into its next network TV special) that doesn’t want to be that much of a distant second to UFC. MMA is a lot more like pro wrestling than anybody will give it credit for.
Speaking of pro wrestling, Bobby Lashley will look to do his best Brock Lesnar impression as he will attempt to make a big splash in a big time MMA promotion with Fedor Emelianenko shitting in his tights all the while. Wes Sims was apparently deemed ‘competitive enough‘ to step into a cage with Bobby Lashley, yet we don’t see this fight being all that competitive. Wes Sims is like that first boss in Super Mario Bros., designed to get you acclimated with the flow of the game, before Bowser really starts to fuck with you. Strikeforce’s Bowser, Fedor Emelianenko, will have a hard time ‘fucking with’ a man with accolades that are eerily similar to a pre-diverticulitis Brock Lesnar should these two meet down the road.
Marius Zaromskis (+200) over Nick Diaz. Because I can’t stand his brother Nate Diaz, UFC’s resident douchebag, Nick Diaz’ failure to capture welterweight gold in this fight would give me residual gratitude. However, while Nate Diaz can drive off of a cliff, I never used personal hostilities to pick my fights and this is no exception.
Marius Zaromskis is a hot welterweight prospect who all but cleaned out the division while fighting with The DREAM Promotion, and it will be interesting to see how he fares at the next level.
Zaromskis should do DREAM proud in what will be the biggest fight of his career, and Nick Diaz has been far too undependable in spots, throughout his own career, to trust even as a slight favorite.
THE PRELIMS
Marcos De Matta over Pablo Alfonso
Michael Byrnes over David Zitnik
Sabah Homasi over John Kelly
David Gomez over Craig Oxley
Ryan Keenan over Hayder Hassan
{Thank you Bodog}
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Tags: Bobby Lashley, Bobby Lashley should still get pyro, Cris Cyborg, MMA, Strikeforce, Strikeforce: Miami
