The Gorilla Press: ECW No More, and our Road To Wrestlemania
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Sunday, February 7, 2010
THE SHEET
Former heavyweight champion Jack Brisco dead at 68 [PW Torch]
WWE namesake worth approximately $300 million according to Forbes [Forbes]
WWE announces NXT show to replace ECW [PW Torch]
Chris Jericho’s next book in the works [Prowrestling.com]
GORILLA CLIP OF THE WEEK
I don’t know what made us think of this clip for this week, but this is the infamous clip of Stone Cold Steve Austin invading Brian Pillman’s home, only to have The Loose Cannon pull a gun on Austin before the camera faded to black. RIP Brian Pillman.
SHOWSTOPPER
FROM RAW
Shawn Michaels is getting back to being Shawn Michaels. The sudden losing streak that seems to be destined to plague Shawn Michaels, until he eventually loses to The Undertaker at Wrestlemania 26, is a breath of fresh air for a character who has played the ‘Barney Fife’ role of the new DX. This losing streak will hopefully carry into next week in that triple threat tag team title match that was booked, meaning the hottest gimmick in The WWE (CM Punk, straight-edge Messiah) will have tag team title gold to boot.
It appears as if Shawn’s growing obsession with The Undertaker will lead to him screwing Taker out of the title at The Elimination Chamber Pay-Per-View, opening the ‘gates of hell’ for a feud between Taker and Shawn and leading to a natural feud between Royal Rumble winner Edge and Chris Jericho for The World title (meaning Jericho would headline at Wrestlemania after all, Bischoff).
So Sheamus is still champion…right?!! It seems as if The WWE trots Sheamus out on TV every week just long enough to remind us that he’s champion. This week’s token Sheamus moment came when the young champion was speared by Edge. Good work, kid, we’ll see you next week on The WWE rewind right before your meaningless squash match against Carlito.
Bret ‘Brawls’ with Vince. Before Bret came back to the fed, a lot of the ubiquitous voices around the Internet insisted that Bret feud with Vince which would culminate in a street fight between the two at Wrestlemania. Some retorted by saying that there would be more money involved in a Shawn/Bret feud, yet the ‘Pro-Bret v. Vince’ crowd quipped by saying that Bret wouldn’t be capable of working a match with Shawn. Our response: So what in the hell makes you think Vince will be able to carry Bret’s ass in a match?
Our fears of seeing Brett lace up his street clothes for one last match against Vince were (somewhat) realized as a fantastic final segment ended in a sloppy brawl where Vince McMahon even lost a shoe before Batista made a surprising save. It seems as if Cena and Batista will have a match with Bret and Vince in each man’s corner. This may be the most viable option if another brawl between Bret and Vince looks anything like the clumsy encounter we saw this past Monday.
FROM SMACKDOWN!
WWE still scared to death of Punk/Batista feud. While a feud between CM Punk and Batista would not make any sense at this point, as both men are heels, I was very curious to see what they would do with this match upon seeing it listed as part of The Smackdown! preview. Personally, the match scared me to death as I knew there was no way Punk would go over Batista clean, and Punk tends to do the job to the bigger superstars (both figuratively and literally). Seeing Batista intentionally walk out on the match was bittersweet, as it showed that this red-hot Punk character actually does have a strong endorsement from the office, yet it still confirms my notions that ther is no way the powers that be would let Punk go over any of the top guys any time soon.
FROM iMPACT!
Nash and Foley in a main event apparently looked good on paper to someone. TNA has been all over the map lately. This week’s mix-and-match booking saw Kevin Nash in a main event with Mick Foley in a hardcore match stemming from a lame duck feud from a month ago that TNA suddenly decided to pick up (See, like Russo said you just gotta be paying attention to EVERYTHING!). If that weren’t head scratching enough, we now have to deal with a feud between Hall and Nash that very well may be an early candidate for worst worked match of the year. I say TNA makes it interesting and make it a ‘loser leaves rehab’ match. In Nash’s case, rehab would refer to injury.
Pope push one of the few bright spots in Hogan era. But something tells me Orlando Jordan will come out of nowhere and beat him clean next week just because.
The Pope has been gold for TNA. They’ve really given him some rope and let him run wild with this character as he never has a dull moment in his promos and never seems to have a bad match. Pope’s clean victory over A.J. Styles this past week only helped fuel the rocket that seems to be attached to his butt. The Pope is one of those guys that TNA needs to keep rolling if they want to begin to be taken seriously as a legitimate threat to ‘The Evil Empire’ that is The WWE.
Late start to Joe/Styles Feud headed in the right direction. We’ve known for weeks now that Samoa Joe would be challenging A.J. Styles for The Heavyweight Championship at Against All Odds (Brother!) but, for some inexplicable reason, Joe has been kept off television. Samoa Joe returned with a vengeance with a squash match against Jesse Neal (see, Rob, there ARE Jobbers) and a heated promo against Flair and Styles after Styles lost his first match of 2010 to The Rock Pope. I also hear there is a fantastic buildup promo currently running on TNA’s website as TNA continues to make up for lost ground.
FROM ECW
Memo To ECW Hasbeens Originals: Vince does not owe you a damn thing. One story that has hit our radar is that ECW originals, namely Tazz, are a bit bent out of shape because of the unceremonious manner in which Vince McMahon ‘proudly’ announced that ECW would be taken off the air. Tazz believes that the new ECW is owed a ‘proper sendoff’ because of the blood, sweat, and tears the old ECW guys put into The Bingo Hall Extravaganza that used to be the old ECW. Tazz, who works for the rival promotion, is putting pressure on Vince McMahon to ‘do the right thing’.
Fuck you, Tazz.
Vince McMahon doesn’t owe ECW a damn thing. If he wants to construct a large middle finger and put it right in front of The ECW logo on the last show, he has every right to do it. Vince bought ECW. He tried to make it work as ‘Extreme Championship Wrestling’ in its truest form, but the company took a new direction and couldn’t accommodate the hardcore spotfests that used to personify that brand. ECW had its run, they fizzled out, Vince tried to resurrect it, they fizzled out again, and now it’s over. The fact that there is a possibility that the owner of a billion dollar industry wanted anything to do with you is the proverbial ‘payment’ that you are owed. That, and nothing else. Be happy that The WWE at least tried to keep your mismanaged legacy alive, and maybe there will be a few ECW: Out of shape, Out of money, and Still Out of Their Damn Minds reuinion shows on the independent circuit that you can hit up down the road. Good riddance.
TIP THE HOST
Anything that comes out of William Shatner’s mouth makes us laugh. WWE’s use of Shatner as he sang the hits of The Superstars was a rare comic gem by the fed in The Guest Host era. There was nothing wrong with Bill’s appearance on RAW as he was once again sprinkled in with the product mix as a guest host of RAW. We leave you, sir, with a $7 tip.
THE SHOOT
This week on The Shoot, we map out our road to Wrestlemania as the Wrestlemania 26 picture begins to take form.
The Gorilla Press Road to Wrestlemania
WWE Championship: Sheamus (c) vs. HHH.
For all the negative criticism HHH gets from the smarts, he is no stranger to putting over other wrestlers on the big stage, especially those who need the win. Think about this, in his last 5 Wrestlemanias, ‘The King of Kings’ is just 1-4 (all in main events) and three of the four losses (to Batista, Chris Benoit, and Orton in a Triple threat) came against wrestlers who had previously never gone over in a Wrestlemania main event. This stat bodes well for Sheamus, who has never even competed in a Wrestlemania and has managed to get himself into the good graces of Triple H as The Game’s workout partner.
World Championship: Chris Jericho (c) vs. Edge
This was a natural feud the minute Edge tore his Achillies heel during a house show while teaming with with the delightfully ego-maniacal Chris Jericho. The direction this feud is taking is a bit unexpected as it seems now, with Edge winning The Royal Rumble, that Jericho will win The Elimination Chamber thus making this a World title match.
Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker
The seeds have already been planted for a rematch of their Wrestlemania 25 classic. The seeds will likely grow into a plant at The Elimination Chamber with Shawn screwing The Undertaker out of The World Championship in order to fully get his attention.
Money in the Bank: Miz vs. MVP vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Morrison vs. Drew McIntyre vs. R. Truth vs. Christian
We are very confident in Shelton Benjamin’s involvement as he seems to be involved in The MITB match for one cool spot before returning to WWE obscurity. Miz is our odds on favorite to win this thing. Get ready for the best heel champion since Edge’s first title reign.
Hair vs. Mask: CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio
With Rey Mysterio having battled real-life substance abuse issues (with one particular episode being a top story on WWE.com) a feud between Mysterio and the Straight Edge character of CM Punk would make the most sense at this point. A hair vs. mask angle could make this match more interesting, however the outcome would be more than predictable and Punk wouldn’t have as much ‘Charles Manson’ heat as a baldy. Perhaps the groundwork to this feud begins to be laid at The Elmination Chamber where both men are participants.
Triple Threat Match: Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes
The Legacy split is one of the few angles that The WWE has actually taken their time to build towards over a course of months. Some complain that they have actually taken too much time, but nevertheless all signs point to these three becoming embroiled in a showdown for generational supremacy in The WWE.
Special Attraction Tag Team Match: Vince McMahon and Batista vs. John Cena and Bret Hart
Many anticipated a street fight between McMahon and Bret in order to give Bret (ironically) a safe environment to work without incurring any headshots. The WWE seems to be going that extra mile in protecting Hart as all signs point to some sort of involvement in a Cena/Batista feud. We also wouldn’t ahve a problem with a Cena vs. Batista match where Bret and Vince would be in each guy’s corner.
WWE Women’s Championship Match: Beth Phoenix (c) vs. Chyna Natalya
We’ve been holding out hope for this match for years. We can always dream, can’t we? Oh, and The Chyna strikeout was in reference to a promo in which Beth Phoenix cut on Chyna after The Royal Rumble.
Grudge Match: The Big Show vs. The Great Khali
Cue the cringe. The WWE doesn’t have anything for The Big Show right now, yet he’s always a good hand to have on Wrestlemania as he does a good job creating that ‘freakshow’ appeal. Khali and Big Show have some legit backstage heat, so the smarts may find this contest interesting as it very well could degenerate into a shoot.
FINISHERS
Our recent initiative to inform the masses of the developmental talent seems to be destined to pay dividends as The WWE’s new ‘NXT’ show looks to feature up and coming talent. Keep in mind that our groundbreaking Gorilla Press Scouting reports have never been done before in the wrestling business, and will only increase in value as The WWE continues to call developmental guys up to the main roster. We have the inside track to the developmental talent currently in the FCW, and what their future may hold We now leave you with a wish list of developmental talent we would like to see as part of The WWE’s NXT show.
- Bryan Danielson (Scouting Report)
- Kaval (Scouting Report)
- Mistico
- Tyler Reks (Scouting Report)
- Joe Henning
- Mike DiBiase
- Heath Slater
- Skip Sheffield
- Justin Angel
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Tags: Bryan Danielson, Gorilla Press Scouting Report, Kaval, The Gorilla Press Pro Wrestling Blog, TNA News, Tylre Reks, Wrestlemania 26, Wrestling News, WWE News
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